Who has heard of EVERYWHERE fest? you know the Nottingham Dollop event that requires everyone to dress like house heads, get off their faces and copy the moves of Madonna's vogue.. Yeah I went there (don't ask). But believe me, I would like to admit that I was forced there, my friends made me go.. but no, I chose off my own back to go there, ME paris, went online and bought a ticket. I have no regrets though (well maybe some). The truth is, I do like house music and last year, as a new fresher to Trent uni, I thought Everywhere was the 'sickest' thing since sliced bread… it's safe to say my expectations were high and sadly they weren't met.
Let me explain how my night went. Firstly, getting ready with the girls - a standard thing to do with any night out or event - happened just like last year, we were happy, drunk, rocking our latest leotard/swimsuit retro get ups, fit for any house night and went over to the 'LADS'. We took some disposable camera shots (some not fit enough for the internet, sorry!) and planned the night ahead. Of course the obvious choices of DJS to see were Artwork, MK, Route 94, Paleman, Hannah Wants (despite the crap venue she was put in, walkabout? seriously?) and Floating Points. But let me just point out, I'm aware these probably weren't the top DJS to see, but to be honest, there wasn't much to choose from. This year had a very WEAK line up compared to last years SBTRCKT, Bontax, Jackmaster etc. Despite the obviously lack of enthusiasm for the DJS, I was still happy to head off to Rock city and get off my face (sorry mum!). Now, you may be reading this like BLA BLA BLA, yawn, but seriously this was probably the best part of my night, it goes down hill from here.
So we get into Stealth, already losing the boys in the 1 hour wait queue forming outside, but with one bomb dropped I was ready to go. Coming up, or so I thought (turns out I was on speed, greeeeat) I enjoyed the set of some DJ. I have no idea, I couldn't tell you who or what they played - emphasising just how 'good' the night was or how irrelevant this night was becoming. Despite this though, the night was looking up, some might say it was quite enjoying. However this enjoyment was rudely interrupted by the sound of my best friend screaming due to some girl puking over her legs and trainers. Nothing could be said though, despite our obvious disgust, sicky girls boyfriend, Mr 'suns out guns out, iced gem haircut wearing sunnies' decided to give out abuse to any who complained. We definitely didn't have time for that so decided to keep our mouths shut and move on.
I guess the rest of the night continued like the above. MK's performance was on top form and to be expected 'head is a jungle' got the biggest response from the crowd. This is simply because everyone in Rock City was there for the hype not the music, anything mainstream was loved, everything else was danced to by the bag heads or the messy freshers because well their fucked up heads had no choice. To be honest it was hard to enjoy the night with wannabes everywhere.. it was laughable really, yet to be expected…. The very fact that this post is about to be cut short is proof enough of how bad the night was, DJS were mediocre, venues were the usual or shite (cough walkabout cough) and the people well, unless you enjoy 18/19 year olds puking and repping a weed designed top and nike roche runs, then well you'll love it, for everyone else I recommend saving your money.
Words by Paris Ayers
Images : Paris' Own and Everywhere official Photographer
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